There are an infinite number of things you could spend your time thinking about, but many of us concentrate great attention on those things that we find most upsetting. Don't ignore what bothers you, but don't focus on it to the exclusion of the things you enjoy.
Ralph owns the corner lot on a crowded Chicago block. He counts his immediate neighbors as friends. One of his neighbors is also his family doctor. The problem is access to backyards. The houses are right on top of each other, and the only way any of his neighbors can drive to their backyards is through Ralph's yard. But Ralphoften parks his car in his yard, which blocks the path of any of his neighbors to their yards. They can walk to their yards, they just can't drive there.
Do they really need to drive to their backyards? Not very often, but the fact that they couldn't because Ralph's car was in the way irritated some of them. Ralph's neighbors researched the city ordinances and found an 1892 rule that appeared to grant them access to Ralph's yard to get to their own. Ralph said the 1892 rule gives them the right to walk through his backyard, not drive through it.
These friends and neighbors soon became neither, for they got together—including the family doctor—and sued Ralph for auto access to their backyards. Relationships deteriorated, all because no one was prepared to sacrifice something that wasn't really important for the sake of peace and friendship.
O O ©
Those who regularly ruminate over negative subjects and unhappiness are 70 percent less likely to feel content than those who do not.Scott and Mclntosh 1999
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