As family members scatter across the country, it becomes easy to forget to include them in your thoughts and in your time. Keep up the contact, share with your family the news of your life. They want to know, and you will feel better if your bond is maintained.
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Two decades ago, Sally moved away from her family's home to go to college. Her mother recalls the time sadly: "It was horrible. I wanted her to pursue her dreams, but I didn't want to lose her. I felt that she wanted to abandon me, that she wanted to be gone."Sally took her mother's reaction as a sign of her mother's insecurity instead of her love, and they grew apart. "She'd ask me why I'd gone so far away. I didn't process it. I felt it was her problem."
Sally's career kept her geographically distant from her family. Over time, Sally's mother showed less and less concern for Sally's decisions. Sally worried that her mother did not care, and their relationship remained as distant as their locations. Then, Sally realized that beneath the initial concern and her mother's more recent reaction, was the same thing: love.
Geography now is no longer a barrier. Sally and her mother communicate regularly, and Sally cherishes the opportunity to visit her hometown. Sally cautions that both those who leave and those who stay have to remember that being apart does not have to mean being distant from each other.
Studies that examine the importance of family to senior citizens as compared to adults not yet entering middle age show family relationships to be an equally crucial component of life satisfaction for both age groups.
O'Connor 1995
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