40.....Satisfaction is relative.
Your happiness is relative to a scale you yourself have created. If you measure your satisfaction right now against the two or three greatest moments in your life, you will often be unhappy because those moments can't be duplicated. If you measure today's satisfaction against some tough days you've had, you have all the reason in the world to appreciate this moment.
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Is Bobby a good student? Well, are you comparing him to his classmates or to Einstein? Is Harrison Ford a good actor? Well, are you comparing him to Keanu Reeves or to Robert DeNiro? Was today a good day? Well, are you comparing it to graduations, weddings, and celebrations, or to your typical Tuesday? We need to consider things in a realistic perspective.
Anthropologists at Rutgers University are finding that one of the most significant determinants of people's enjoyment of work is their feelings about their home life. Many people are finding their work more tolerable because their family situations have become more stressful.
The Rutgers team finds that people are clinging to the order and friendship available in the workplace and that the often hectic, pressure-filled home life suffers by comparison.
The sad reality, of course, is that your home life cannot duplicate those aspects of the workplace and shouldn't be expected to. Jobs should be compared to other jobs but not to the home, where everything is both more complex, and offers more potential rewards.
A good day on the job should be thought of relative to other days on the job. A good day at home should be thought of relative to other days at home.
Anthropologists at Rutgers University are finding that one of the most significant determinants of people's enjoyment of work is their feelings about their home life. Many people are finding their work more tolerable because their family situations have become more stressful.
The Rutgers team finds that people are clinging to the order and friendship available in the workplace and that the often hectic, pressure-filled home life suffers by comparison.
The sad reality, of course, is that your home life cannot duplicate those aspects of the workplace and shouldn't be expected to. Jobs should be compared to other jobs but not to the home, where everything is both more complex, and offers more potential rewards.
A good day on the job should be thought of relative to other days on the job. A good day at home should be thought of relative to other days at home.
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Not surprisingly, surveys find that happy people tend to have more positive experiences than unhappy people. What is striking is that, objectively, their lives aren't really much different.Studies find that happy people experience much fhe same range of events as unhappy people. The real difference is in what they define as positive and negative. Happy people are those who use a lower threshold in order to label an event positive.
Parducci 1995
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